I Am A Jerk… Apparently

So one of my friends posted this on The Facebook the other day, proclaiming that one of our mutual friends would love it. 

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              I stared at the photo for a while.  There were two possibilities here.  Either my friend hates this monstrosity and is pointing out how hilariously bad it is, or she actually likes it.  To further complicate matters, one of her other friends commented, “I want one too.” 

              That comment further muddied the waters for me, because is she being sarcastic, or does she really like it?  So I start off politely, trying to venture a comment to feel out the situation, “Could you please tell me what I am looking at here?”  I queried.   

               I know, I know, I probably should have just walked away, but I couldn’t help myself.  I had to know.  I became so obsessed, that I showed people at work, even patients, the picture.   I took a poll asking what they thought.  I did not give my opinion so it was a blinded study and very scientific.  My research was of no help.  Half the people thought it was horrible, and the other half thought it was wonderful (although I expect that the half that thought it was great was just being polite, and that half was heavily stacked with little old ladies). 

             My friend replied to my question, “Most people would know this is a candle holder made of seashells, you are so funny….ha.ha.” 

            This did nothing to elucidate the key point as to whether my friends actually like this or not.  I am not always up to date on the latest styles.  Maybe it is like those brightly patterned palazzo pants that I don’t understand at all.  Other people seem to like them, but I think they just make people look like scary, sad clowns.

             I really, really should have let this go at this point, but I couldn’t help myself, so I replied, “Seriously, sarcasm does not translate well on  Facebook. Are we supposed to like this hot mess?”  (Maybe I should have left that last part out.)

             And I have been met with unmitigated silence since my post, so I assume that I am a Jerk, and we are indeed supposed to like this.  My friends will probably read this and think I am an even bigger Jerk, but in for a penny, in for a pound I always say.  And I don’t care what they say, anything that used to be part of an animal (antlers, pelts, shells, etc.) should not be used in home decor.

 

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8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Bettie Jordan
    Jun 04, 2014 @ 22:31:44

    You are so refreshing!

    Reply

  2. Julia Brooks
    Jun 05, 2014 @ 01:21:50

    I’m with you, Kelly. This thing is simply ugly my Friend.

    Reply

  3. Sasha
    Jun 05, 2014 @ 02:14:28

    Hahaha, I love your questions!! I would have been thinking the same thing but probably wouldn’t be so bold as to actually ask it! 🙂

    Reply

  4. Vicki Wallace
    Jun 05, 2014 @ 11:52:00

    It looks like a phallic symbol

    Reply

  5. Mary Jane Shellabarger
    Jun 05, 2014 @ 22:30:53

    I am so glad you told us what it is, I had no idea. I do not think I need one, nor will I be looking for one to give as a gift. It sort of looks like some created it some some vacation souvenirs.

    Reply

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